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Monday, December 26, 2011

Results Are In

As time passed, some of my questions were answered. Brent explained how his childhood was very dysfunctional. He told me that his parents divorced when he got out of high school. His dad and he haven’t spoken in over 15 years and that his mother is deceased. As far as siblings, he has two brothers. The oldest one was not to be trusted because, apparently, his wife is BFF with Brent’s ex-wife. And the other one, worked at the same automotive company that we did. He said he always kept some sort of civil relationship with that one because they owned a cottage together in Northern Michigan and their professional careers would intertwine from time to time.
When my friends kept pushing the marriage issue, I really started to question him. Finally, he came clean - ONLY, because I demanded to see a divorce decree. Although, his wife originally was the one who filed (which was different then what I was told) – the divorce was not yet final. There was a lot of fighting back and forth and the whole case was very complex. He claims that he told me the divorce was final because he was afraid I wouldn’t continue the relationship. And he’s right! I didn’t like it, but since the proceedings were already in play – I decided to stay in the relationship.
It wasn’t much time after, the soon to be ex claimed she was pregnant. I was told by Alex and Maci while Brent was at work. So, when he came home I asked him about it. He sat the kids down and explained to them that this new sibling, if true, would be considered a half brother or sister since they didn’t share the same father, but, for them to love him or her just as they would each other. It wasn’t long until this story hit the divorce court – only this time, the claim was that Brent was the father. A DNA test was ordered after the child’s arrival.
It seemed like 4-ever until the results came in. As I was sitting at my desk at work, the phone rang and the caller id showed up as Brent’s office. He said “I’m going to call this DNA office in Texas and I want you to be on the phone, so that you know I’m not pulling anything crazy.” I felt I had the right to know, so I agreed. I remember a lady answering the phone with a very strong Texas-like accent. She explained that due to HIPPA laws, she was unable to disclose the results over the phone but if he had a personal fax machine, she would fax the information. He agreed and proceeded to give her my fax number. So, when the results came through – we were both standing there anxiously to see what it said.
Clear as day, it showed a bunch of figures between Brent, the child, and the ex. I didn’t know what the heck I was reading, so I focused on the bottom line. It said something like Brent was 99.9% NOT the father of this child. At that moment, I had mixed emotions. I was happy that it wasn’t him, so I was able to continue my journey with this man. Yet, I was sad for this poor innocent child and quiet frankly, I was sad for the ex. I couldn’t imagine what all of these children would be facing in the future since the youngest didn’t even share the same last name. The whole situation was very “Jerry Springer” – something you only see on TV and never in real life. At least, in my life I never experienced something like that!
Our lease on our apartment was up and we decided to start house hunting. Now that this DNA test was behind us, it wasn’t much longer until the judge granted the divorce and we could continue our life together. We had hopes and dreams of getting married some day and immediately starting a family. Brent was such an amazing father and when Alex and Maci where at their mother’s house – he missed them terribly! Not to mention, I love children and I always wanted at least ten … but, Brent would only commit to five. Lol!

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