Monday, December 26, 2011
My Fairytale Wedding
On January 20, 2006, it was official – I WAS ENGAGED!! We set a date of May 27th that year. What can I say, at that point we had been together for three years, had bought a beautiful home, and we both felt we were ready for the next step.
However, a couple of months before the wedding – the whole family issue started to pick at my brain – especially, since he had no plans of inviting them. So, I approached Brent with contacting his family and at least telling them what was going on. I mean, they lived in Michigan; it wasn’t like you see them every day. His response was “You can … I don’t want anything to do with those people.” And so I did …. I started my usual “Google” search. To my surprise, I found out that his mother was very much alive. He finally came clean with that and said that he hasn’t talked to her and considers her dead because some really bad things happened. I felt sorry for him once again, and overlooked yet another lie. But, I still felt it was my place to introduce myself and wrote a letter to both of his parents. I told them how we met and what a gentleman he was and that our plans were to marry and start a family right away. And I would make sure if they wanted to attend the wedding that each of them would have different places to stay; yet still be very apart of all the details. Then, when the invitations were sent out – I made sure to add both brothers and their families, as well as the parents and their significant others.
I received the RSVP card from both of the brothers stating they would not be attending. The father sent one back and said he would be there. And the mother sent me a really nice letter and left her number for me to call. Of course, I was a little nervous to do so – so I waited a couple of days before I made the call. She was very nice, but said due to her ailing health she would not be able to attend the wedding. It was nice to start this relationship with her – she was so sweet and called me all the time, sent cards, and would knit things for me. Eventually, she and Brent started talking at least once a week. And when Alex and Maci were at our house – she would talk to them. It was kind of refreshing! However, I felt it was odd that the father never replied to my long ass letter. But, I was happy that I would finally get to meet him!
Gregory Lyons Sr., the father, arrived at our house the night before the wedding. He was very nice and I was embarrassed by Brent’s reaction towards him in telling him that he couldn’t stay at our house – he had to go find a hotel. The house was full of the wedding party after the rehearsal and I had to literally introduce Maci to her grandfather. I invited him to stay at my parents’ house, since that’s where I would be staying that night. He accepted.
Our wedding was a pretty big thing. In fact, the local cable station aired it for years to follow. A LOT of people attended and the bridal party itself was big. Speaking of that, the wedding was actually almost called off because of that. I admit, I was so excited and wanted the special people in my life to be a part of my special day – and Brent was mad because he felt I had “a starting NFL line up” … or maybe it was “NHL” – you know how those northerns’ are (no offense) with their hockey. Either way, he didn’t want people in it that he didn’t know – so I had to make some changes and he had to accept some things as well. I wonder now, if that was my sign to get away while I still could. The one thing that really bothered me though was we had a mutual male friend who I loved as family. He was great and we went through so much with him, yet Brent refused to have him as a groomsmen. But, since I stirred up so much drama with the wedding party – I had to let him pick the guys and I picked the girls. But, thankfully … the guy I’m talking about, let’s call him Bob, at least was an usher.
You know whether girls admit it or not, they already have their weddings planned as little girls. And mine was just as I imagined. The ceremony was outside on lake scenery with a waterfall in the background. The guy who married us was a mutual friend from work, who we both highly respected. A horse and carriage, like Cinda-freakin-rella had, delivered my parents and I to that long walk. I chose to have both my parents give me away, since they are both so important in my life vs. the traditional father doing it alone. I picked out every song and had players from the Louisville orchestra playing instruments. During the ceremony, we released a pair of doves to symbolize our love for each other. I remember walking down the aisle and the scared feeling of “all eyes on me” disappeared and all I could focus on was Brent. His reaction was priceless. The look on his face was adorable and his eyes started to tear up. I loved this guy and couldn’t wait to spend every minute with him.
After we became man and wife, the reception hall was at the same property. I remember making such a big deal to the limo company that since we worked at Ford – the limo HAD to be a Ford product. And that since my parents were paying the bar tab, I wanted the limo to stay outside and give any one that had too much to drink a ride home. My family is awesome! I wouldn’t trade them for anything. And one of our traditions is for all of us to karaoke “Family Tradition” by Hank Williams, Jr. We did so and the freakin’ DJ’s were bad ass! So, that party was rockin!
The honeymoon was beautiful – we went to Turks and Caicos. It was so amazing – everything about it. The water was so blue it was unimaginable! Weather was warm, yet a cool breeze continued to blow. It was an Adults Only Resort, so at night it would turn into a big club. They had Las Vegas like shows … and, oh, did I forget to mention it was all inclusive.
Upon our return for this Caribbean paradise, we had a lay over in Charlotte, North Carolina. The first person I called was my mom … after I told her of my amazing experience, she followed it up with a warning. “Your father-in-law stayed for several days after your wedding. And has sent me a detailed email about what needs to be done.” I logged into her account and was shocked and disgusted to what he had to say. It was bottom line telling us who and what to allow around us and our home, every move we need to make, and so on. Of course, I couldn’t sit quietly so when I returned to Louisville I called him and set him straight. Of course, in a nice manner, but basically said – we make the decisions, his opinion will be considered, and that basically it was our life and as long as he wanted to be part of it – he would have to allow us to figure life out on our own.